Sunday, July 29, 2012

No Time For Friends

I have three very good friends: Janja, Damjana & Natascha. All of them I know for a very loooong time. Some longer than the other. Although we don't see, hear or even text to each other every day, I'm stil in touch with them every now and then. 

As we don't live in the same town or even in the same part of the country, this is no wonder.

We all work full time. We all have families of our own and troubles of our own.

No time for friends? It has been enought of that.

So last week's Friday - not the one two days ago - I realised that I haven't seen Natascha for just too long, I decided to take a day off from my work (jeah right, like I don't have a mobile), just to make time to visit her.

We spent quite some hours together at her place. She runs a family hotel, she has hard time to leave it and this is probably another reason, why we have so much trouble to get together.

She gets off during the week, when I work and we get our weekends off when she is busy the most. 

I haven't seen Damjana for quite some time either. It was funny, but few weeks ago. before summer holidays started, she called me if I'm home in the afternoon. I was just on my way home from my work and I was TOTALY surprised.

Her/our problem, why we don't see each other more often is - she works the afternoons and I work in the mornings. Imagine how should we get togheter? Also we don't work in the same town - not much - just 120 km apart.

Janja lives and works almost 170 km away. We started as pen-friends (in those days when the letters were still 'in') when we were teenagers. I don't remember when it was last time I saw her.  

Sadly, but this is my reality now.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Saturday, July 14, 2012

When reality hits...

hits hard...

I'm lucky enough to have a husband who inspite of his own 40 hours week job still manages to keep the house tidy, prepares late lunch on the table and keeps children safe, fed and clean.

Last two weeks I worked as a mule. Literally. As my colleague took her summer holidays off, I was in my office for 10 to 11 hours per day and another two in my car. You can imagine how much time I had for my family.

To have at least some hours for them I got up early, at 3:45 a.m. to be in my office at 5 a.m. I worked as far as 3 or 4 p.m.. Came home an hour later after leaving the office.

Loris ended school three weeks ago and her summer holidays started at the same time (surprise, surprise). As she is just too little to be left home alone from 6:30 a.m. untill 3:30 p.m., she stayed at my parents house. We got her back every Friday and took her there every Sunday. So, thank you Mom and Dad. Without your help, we don't know what we would do.

But yesterday's one hour drive from my work to my parents house to pick up Loris, was full of thoughts. O.K. I think almost all the time, but this time I was not occupied only with Patrik's future, but I was thinking of our near future. It didn't look bright and shiny...

How do we manage? How do we cope? Emotionally? Financially?

Financially is somewhat mistery. Really. We both work. Full-time. We both bring home our monthly paychecks... however simple math is not enough.

For mortage and insurances we give 40% of our income.
For school, kindergarten and everything that fells into this category - 14% - and they are public facilities.
For all the house bills (electricity, heating, water... etc.) - 21%
Patrik's health (therapies) 20%

So, simple math says that we have for daily expenses through the month  (food, petrol, etc...) exactly 5% of our income.
It looks a lot, but if I would reveal to you our monthly income in €, you would see it's not that much.
How do we manage? We try. We calculate. We recalculate. And then we do it all over again. 
It's mistery... and few bills not paid on time... and everytime that happens, I feel ashamed.       

Few months ago the picture was not so bad. It was not so good either, but it was not so bad as it is now and the future... Well, it can get even worse.
I don't dare to think, but little voice in my head, when I sleep keep telling me: 'What if one of us loses our job? What then?' 
When I wake up, I do all that I can to prevent this fate for us. 

How do we cope emonionally? Hmm...
We talk alot, but for the past few months we somewhat avoided the theme and yesterday I made a mistake (I could say)... I explained J the simple math I did yesterday on my way home.

He was avare of the situation, but seeing the numbers layed down on the table - was simple too much.

I realised that when afterwards, when the children went sleeping, J went to clean the bathroom and a shower. He does that when something troubles him.

I blame the world crisis for the situation we are in. Before it we lived well. Our monthly income was larger so the percentage was different and although we cut all the unnecessary expenses... the situation is far from good.

Yesterday I heard someone saying:

"Rich is just another word for safe."

I agree. 

Right now
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Monday, July 02, 2012

E Viva Espana

European, of course... 

Me and J are not extra fans of the game. We are more F1 fans - at least we used to be - even visited the race in Italy several years ago. But we never visited any of football game... Usuall we even switch the channel when the game is on. 

This last months I realised something... Very interesting... 

We don't watch (a lot) the games, but we know The game. 

Actually, we don't watch it, unless: 

* there is an European Championship on TV (like it was the last month - Euro 2012); 
* there is a World Cup on TV (like it was two years ago); 

* there is a European Champion League - which is every year - but then we are more picky: 
 -- we watch if Barça (FC Barcelona) is playing;
 -- we watch if FC Manchester United, FC Chelsea... (or any other team from UK) is playing;
-- we watch when FC Bayern is playing (O.K. - J is watching; I'm sleeping);
-- we watch games when Quarter Finals starts 

and we have one more example when we watch the game: 

* when El Clasico is on the TV - you don't need to ask me, who is my favourite... ;o) 

So, we don't watch the football... If you believe... 

Looking back on this list above... 

We have to confess - especially to ourselves 


Believe it or not - even Patrik watched the Final of Euro 2012.