Sunday, October 30, 2011

Patience is a virtue... Part 2

So, let me continue where I left off yesterday...

Last Tuesday - this week - we had another appointment at speech pathologist. Before the appointment I met a friend with her child, which I know through the e-mails. She is also a mother of a boy with autism. We were discousing a lot through last year and a half, but never got a chance to see each other. Well, we saw each other two years ago at one seminar, but that was it. 

So let me apologise: "I'm sorry that I didn't recognise you right away, when you aproached. I'm really a goldfish when I have to connect names and faces. It's terrible of me and I promise to do better next time."

But the speech pathologist came right then so we had to end the brief conversation and Patrik and I went to the meeting. Patrik sat down at the table the minute we came in. I was so proud to tell her what did he all week long. I can't tell if Patrik was disappointed, certanly I was as she didn't even try to see his 'new knowledge'. Again Patrik picked up rolled marbles, glass stones and put them into tin cans... As previous time.

We spoke a little bit, not much, about Patrik's possibilies of education. Which school we had in our minds. I thought I made her clearly. One day later, I realised I was wrong. Maybe she thought that she made it clearly for me. Yet she was defenitely wrong. But... 
I will leave this behind (maybe it would be better to say - infront of me - yet this battle is not lost, nor won).

Again five to ten minutes before the end of the session, she introduced new task to him. Searching for pairs. 
She had two small ring boxes, two snail's houses, two pearl necklaces, two... well, I didn't remember them all. With no explanations she wanted him to know what did she want. O.K. she told me, yet, when we speak with Patrik or about him and he is present, we are always triing to envolve him into conversation. For many people this is strange, but for us is not. He understands us. He is smart boy with inability of speech and some people just can't undestand that. 

Well, of course at first he didn't know what she wanted. Again she 'helped' him pick up the pairs. They did this together two times and the hour finished. We went back home. 
But... (I use quite of 'buts', don't I)... anyway, at home in the afternoon, Patrik again went to the bookshelves - there is the whole wall of bookcases, and we don't have only books there - and he stood infront the box of blocks. Let me tell you that our boy didn't show us in the past much of much of preference to the blocks, so this defenitely surprised me. I took the box from the shelf and opened it at the table. Took some of the blocks out - 4 green and 4 blue - two different shapes and asked him to pick up the pairs. He started and I slowly corrected his doing. 

He did this the whole week. Every time he showed initiation - well, I put the box on the table, beside the piggy bank - we did the task. Later, let be honest - yesterday when he finished again the task, when he decided that he had enough, I realised I made a mess of it. Instead of keep it simple, I managed to complicate it. I forgot to tell him what kind of pairs he had to pick up. Just by the colours, without the shapes? Just by the shapes and without the colours? Well, even the best of us (ha-ha-ha), here and there make the mess where we should do it simple.

I heard one saying a long time ago. I don't know who said it, who is the author, but it goes like this:
"The man who makes no mistakes, usually does nothing!" (unknown)
Many times it gives me some comfort after I realise I made a mistake again. 

But now I began to remind myself:
"You must make as little mistakes as possible. It's not of the sake of your life, it's all about your children. Both children." 



  1. Nothing wrong with mistakes, it is another way of learning...... that's life! :D

  2. “Mistakes show us what we need to learn.” - Peter McWilliams

  3. One of the hardest thing is to keep it simple. It is SO MUCH easier to complicate.

    Thank you for your posts! I found your blog through your sister. I work with one child with autism and your thoughts help me a lot!

  4. Živjo Maja,

    me veseli da ti pomaga. Če si izposodim besede kolegice Di; Blog je res prav posebna vrsta in poceni terapija... :o)

    Če lahko vprašam; kje in kaj delaš?